Letters to Brady: Five years old

Brady,

Happy 5th birthday!  As you told me the other day, "'I'll be a whole handful!"  And yes, you sometimes are.  But more often than not, you are the easy-going child that I had from the start. You have a lot of your dad in you...which is wonderful, and terrifying.

You and Jackson have an incredible relationship, and you deserve so much credit for fostering such a great bond.  An older brother holds much power.  I have been so proud to see you use that power for good.  You want Jackson to succeed and to feel good about himself.  You let him win, you tell him he's great, and strong, and good.  And by saying those things to him, you prove them about yourself.  Jackson is a sensitive soul and I'll watch him get upset when someone takes a toy or wrongs him in some way.  For many younger brothers, that's the norm. But that is one lesson Jackson didn't learn from his older brother.  You've always showed him what it means to share, how to take turns, how to work out a disagreement, how to right a wrong, and when I see Jackson do those things to his peers, my proud moments are amplified.  I feel pride not only in Jackson, but in you.

You'll graduate from preschool next week and after the summer ends, you'll hop on yellow school bus and drive off to basically, become a teenager.  I'm skipping a few steps, but kindergarten is like the gateway drug to big scary things.  You still have this innocence about you that I see and already miss, because I know I will wake up one day and it will be gone.  Sure, it'll be nice if, for example, if you stop sucking your thumb when you go to kindergarten.  But it won't be nice if it takes kids teasing you to do so.  I don't worry about you making friends, that's always come easy for you.  I do worry about the other kids who might not make friends as easily, and hope with all my heart that you will be the kid that notices, and does something about it.  I don't lose sleep worrying about you getting bullied, or about you bullying others, but I do pray that you won't be a bystander when you see it happen to someone else.  Standing up to bullies takes an extreme bravery that not every child possesses.  A whole new scary beautiful world is about to open up to you, Brady, and I hope you can be brave and be bold.  I don't care if you are the smartest in your class or the best on your team.  I do care that you are kind.  And I am comforted because I know that you are.  I read something the other day that stuck with me.  It said, "Don't become so concerned with raising a good kid that you forget you already have one."

I have a great one. 

These last five years with you have been the best of my life (and I had some pretty good years in college).  Back when you were a baby and I wrote you monthly letters, I remember writing about how I was suprised not how much I loved you, but how much I liked you.   I never expected to like a child as much as I liked you, even as a baby.  That holds true today.  I love you, and I like you, and I am honored to be your mom.  Happy birthday.

Love,
Mom